Most of today has been pretty quiet, and after a rather fussy night last night I’m appreciating the quiet.  Right now Elliana is bright eyed in her bouncy seat watching tv, and no tears have been shed in the last couple of hours.  Luckily most of the tears shed today weren’t even hers.

This morning I finally broke down and pulled out the baby nail clippers to take care of those long finger nails.  Until now I’ve been biting them off because I was afraid of the nail clippers, but they’re getting too thick to bite.  I decided my only option was to attempt to do my best with the little nail clippers since I don’t have a pair of the nail scissors.or I could let her continue to scratch herself.  I decided option one was better.

I started gently clipping while she was napping, and all was well.  I was on the last nail and had just congratulated myself on doing such a good job of clipping them without waking her when she decided to wake up.  She jerked her hand up right as I clipped the nail, and the clipper nicked the tip of her finger. 

The sight of blood had me flipping out even though she didn’t shed a tear.  In fact it didn’t phase her at all.  She acted like nothing happened at all even though I was busy wiping little drops of blood off her finger and her shirt.  Of course I broke down in tears as I worked to stop the bleeding.  As soon as I had the bleeding stopped I had to call Hubby and cry to him.  I felt horrible because not only does she now have a little cut on her finger, but it was bad enough to bleed for a good 2 minutes, and I caused it.  I think that’s the worst part of it.  I hurt my little girl.

I know it’s not something I did purposely, but it still made me feel absolutely horrible.  Hubby pointed out that she didn’t even whimper, so it must be ok, and then he reminded me that there will be many more times in the future when I’m dealing with my little girl getting hurt.  He mentioned that she’ll be getting her 2 month shots on the 28th.  After today’s fiasco I decided I don’t think I’ll be in the room with her for the shots.  If I flipped out when she wasn’t crying over a little wound I don’t think I can handle being there when she’s getting poked and screaming.  I know I’ll have to get used to it, but I think I’ll let Hubby handle it this time.